still vacillating about what to do

i know that sooner or later i have to make a big decision, which i'm sure will bring about a great change in my life. and i'm scared of it, yes, i admit.
now i realize i'm not that smart or confident about anything.

sorry i cannot write it precisely 'cause i don't feel like it now.
later, maybe after i get back to japan, i'll become capable of talking about it...
but it's not a big deal at all, just a trivial, private matter. no need to worry or care about me!